10 MORE POINTS! Yes! The whole bar was very interested in the spectacle of all this going on at 2:50pm on a Saturday. The best part about doing tequila body shots is that you don't even need to pour salt on your hand first, because people are naturally salty! Yay!
Hahaha. Check out the winning smile and graceful poise. This guy is 100% professional. Other bartenders take note. (PS - Check out the guy in the background making an "Oh" face.)
It took her all of about 10 minutes to use her razor sharp puppy teeth (and tiny puppy raptor claws!) to create a puppy-sized hole in the gate's mesh that she could easily wriggle her way through! Most adorable jailbreak ever!
See? It was so unbelievable. This photo looks totally staged with her little paw draped over my shoulder, but this was how she wanted to ride right from the get-go. It was about this time that we realized we'd gotten a weirdo.
As soon as we got her into the warmth of a cab, she stopped with all the strange mewling noises she was making and immediately settled down. We were trying to hold her on our laps, but she kept climbing up and wedging her self between our backs and the seat. It seemed like she really wanted to sit perched up on our shoulders.
She arrived wrapped in a blanket inside a tiny crate. We took her out and she was cold, shivering and making adorable "mewling" noises. We took her out of the crate and she was delighted to be with us immediately. We couldn't get over how cute she was.
...Iron Cross hub caps (with a skull in the center) and awesome "HONKY LIPS" graffiti on the passenger side, rear corner-panel. Someone paying awesome homage to...
Meredith told Bob that she wanted to punch him in the face and Bob shrugged and said "Go ahead then. Punch me in the face. Hard. Do it." Meredith was happy to oblige (and I was happy to snap this picture just BEFORE impact was made). The look on her face is awesome. "I know I shouldn't be doing this BUT..."
...and satiate everyone's caffeine cravings with a delicious new concoction he called "TEA-PUCCINO!" It was like the Grand-Slam of dad jokes. This picture rules.
...transform into an operatic songbird with a decorative lamp shooting out of your head! (This is basically Lisa transforming into a Dr. Seuss drawing)
As soon as I saw this photo, I was like "THAT'S OUR DOG." Meredith was excited and was like "YES!" (Later, Meredith told me that she didn't think the dog was all that cute but she trusted my judgement. Haha).
Later on in the evening, I took a picture of Jen bending over with the flash on and it went right through the pair of shiny, stretchy black pants she was wearing. I also really like how it looks like KT is pressing on Jen's asshole like she's ringing a doorbell. Bonus points to The Wang for laughing between her legs. I call this photo DING-DONG-DING-US.
I gave her step by step instructions and stepped back to try to capture an action shot. Less than a minute later, BLAMO! Check out the action shot I managed to capture of Amanda cutting the bottle top clean off!
A couple days after the party, we all received an email from him with a link to a surprise video he'd edited together with all the clandestine hula hooping video he'd shot. It. Is. Amazing. My favorite part is the highlight reel of everyone throwing their hands up and leaning that starts around the 1:45 minute mark (right after Siege does the "white man's overbite") and just keeps getting better. (PS - Make sure you check out Ellen's sideways "tit-sway" at 2:14. Amazing.)
...my dad took us next door to see Bruce's condo. He'd already done a bunch of work to "Brucify" the place. Check out the MEGACOUCH he put in the living room. It's the only couch I've seen where sitting isn't an option. You can ONLY lay on the thing. It's basically like having a leather bed in your living room.
After I got back, Meredith and I got krunked on Pina Colada wine coolers (I love how tropically festive it looks next to the holiday basket in the background)...
After we'd gotten Meredith ambulatory, it was time for us to be taken on a tour of the new community. We traveled by GOLF CART of course. Check out my parent's ride! On the front it says "The Battjer's"...
Court and John Berk! The open bar ended at 11pm, but Court made an executive decision to throw down some plastic and keep the party train rolling. Yes! Love how the Cosby sweater has made it over to John at this point.
OMG. Back in the day, Leigh used to be out late every single weeknight in the Lower East Side - so much so that she became friends with some of the garbage men that had that route and they used to give her and her roommate Jessica rides home to make sure they got home safely. Haha. We got out of Lawrence's party and when a garbage truck passed us, Leigh hailed it like a taxi AND THE GUY STOPPED. Hahaha. Let's hear it for free rides!
On Monday, Meredith and I went out to NJ to meet up with the rest of my family to attend my grandfather's funeral. After 2 long years of being in and out of the hospital and a long, slow, decline, he finally passed on. Love you, Grandpa. We miss you lots.
It's like a photo of Peter Griffin going skiing! (PS - Remember when Fatty and I borrowed all my parents old ski gear to go skiing and it ended up looking like we were going to an 80s party in Williamsburg?)
Halloween was on a Friday and that kind of sucks because then EVERYONE comes into town and the streets get a little messy. I was moseying down 2nd Ave on my way to a party and I randomly ran into Josh and Jenny. A full two years before the Jersey Shore debuted on MTV Josh absolutely murdered with his douchebag costume. (Check him doing the shocker and everything!). Jenny was the Wicked Witch of the West. Man, I can't stop looking at Josh's outfit. Ok, and that killer pout. Genius.
