I started the month of May off strong by throwing down with a Karaoke Killed the Cat karaoke night right off the bat! ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

No idea at all who this guy was, but his... ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

...throw himself down onto the floor, over-the-top karaoke performance made my camera come out! ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

Well done, sir! ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

Same goes for this broseph - no idea who he was, but when he jumped down off that karaoke stage and took the mic "out into the crowd," he landed himself a place right inside my karaoke-heart. Awwww. ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

Check out homeboy bringing it! The blonde girl in the background is fucking shocked and shit. She CAN'T HANDLE the 'roke he's dishing. ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

Other brosephs were so overcome with bromance that they were fainting into his arms. Epic. ˆ bromance ˆ karaoke ˆ strangers ˆ

The place was pretty much packed with all people I didn't recognize...at least until Shandi took with stage to sing a duet with Kareem (who I don't know but I like his photography a lot). ˆ kareem black ˆ shandi ˆ duet ˆ karaoke ˆ

They killed it. ˆ kareem black ˆ shandi ˆ duet ˆ karaoke ˆ

Afterwards, I went around the corner over to the Annex to say hi to Sarah and Karen who were there DJing. ˆ sarah ˆ dj ˆ

I ran into my buddy Jared on the dancefloor! (Jared was the lead singer of the now defunct New York band, Group Sounds. They recently released what is HANDS DOWN, the funniest music video I've ever seen in my life. I know I say that about a lot of things, but trust me on this. Take three minutes out of your day right now and watch it: Temporarily in Love by Group Sounds. ˆ jared ˆ

Me and Karen! I like how this photo... ˆ karen ˆ me ˆ

....sort of lines up with this photo and you can see why we're making the expressions that we're making! ˆ legs ˆ skirt ˆ

Jared (hahaha), Brandon and Sarah. ˆ brandon ˆ jared ˆ sarah ˆ

Karen totally managed to get Jared's weiner out on the dance floor! Woot! ˆ jared ˆ karen ˆ

On Friday night I put on a tiny, white corduroy jacket with tiny, tiny little pockets and just stood around. ˆ me ˆ corduroy ˆ jacket ˆ

On Saturday night I went to MisShapes with Brandon and Sarah (seen here with Sean Dack sneaking in the last-minute bird). It was so hot and crowded and sweaty that we tried to hide out in a tiny corner in the back. ˆ brandon ˆ sarah ˆ sean dack ˆ misshapes ˆ the bird ˆ

I was at the bar getting a drink with Leigh and Alexis when, out of nowhere, Fancy (yes, that's his name) ran over to say hi to Leigh... ˆ alexis ˆ fancy ˆ leigh ˆ misshapes ˆ

and suddenly, an impromptu arm wrestling match broke out! They fiercely locked arms... ˆ alexis ˆ fancy ˆ leigh ˆ arm wrestle ˆ misshapes ˆ

...and then it was ON! ˆ alexis ˆ fancy ˆ leigh ˆ arm wrestle ˆ misshapes ˆ

I know it looks like they're kidding around, but I assure you, this was DEADLY SERIOUS. Here they are approaching the end of minute one and they're still locked up at the top! (Check out Alexis' face as she cheers them on. Hahaha!) ˆ alexis ˆ fancy ˆ leigh ˆ arm wrestle ˆ misshapes ˆ

Here's Leigh summoning an extra jolt of power from her broken, wonky finger. In the end, they called it a draw! Fancy should've totally turned his hat around backwards and turned "from a man to a MACHINE!", ala Lincoln Hawk (!!!), the competitive arm wrestler (expertly!) portrayed by Sylvester Stallone's in the greatest (only?) arm wrestling-themed movie of all time: "Over the Top". What's that? You've never heard of this incredible movie? Dont' worry, YouTube's got you covered.

Not to go too far off onto an "Over the Top" tangent, but I think it's probably important (cathartic?) for me to mention that not only did I see this movie in the theater during its original theatrical run, I saw this movie on my very first date! How insane is that? I was in fifth grade, and Geri Fox and I went on a double date with Jimmy Rotsides and Renee Rusch! Hahaha. Afterwards, the girls' parents picked them up and then Jimmy and I went to the Ledgewood Mall where I bought one-pound bag of watermelon jellybeans (at Sound-o-rama!) and then went and slept over Jimmy's house. We talked about how awesome our dates went and how awesome we were for taking "our girls" to the "right" movie. I ended up eating the entire one-pound bag of jellybeans and threw up in the middle of night. Holy jeez, what memories! How did I get so old?

And now it's time for the "where are they now" part of this VH1 series: Geri Fox is married, I ran into her and met her husband at Bev Chase's wedding! Jimmy Rotsides, unfortunately, died. He sort of grew up into a rough character and sometime around '99 or so he ended up falling out of a canoe while fishing and drowned in a pond in my home town. Sad. As for Renee Rusch, I have no idea what happened to her! So Renee, if you ever read this, say hi! (Okay, this is starting to sound like the lyrics to a Bryan Adams' song "Jimmy died, Geri got married..." so I guess that means it's time to leave memory lane and get back to... ˆ alexis ˆ fancy ˆ leigh ˆ arm wrestle ˆ finger ˆ misshapes ˆ

...the present! After the arm wrasslin' bout, I ran into Lauren Flax! Who was... ˆ lauren flax ˆ misshapes ˆ

...soft-packin' a big pink mic! Hahah. ˆ beer ˆ mic ˆ misshapes ˆ

Lauren's good friend Crazy Jay was there. He took Lauren's inflatable microphone and showed off his... ˆ crazy jay ˆ mic ˆ misshapes ˆ

...skillz! Hahaha. He was so proud of this. He kept being like "Dude, check it! Check it! I have no gag reflex. I can take this mic ALL THE WAY DOWN!" Hahaha. ˆ crazy jay ˆ blow job ˆ misshapes ˆ

Then he flipped the mic around to show-off how he could also get his mouth "completely around the wide-part too!" Just when you thought it couldn't get any gayer... ˆ crazy jay ˆ blow job ˆ misshapes ˆ

...Jay's buddy swept in for a little double-dong action. Hahahah. ˆ crazy jay ˆ blow job ˆ duet ˆ misshapes ˆ

Then I ran into Posh Tony and some cute (Australian?) girl he was with. (By the way, I don't know if you can tell from this photo, but Posh Tony looks EXACTLY like a "white version" of JB Smoove, the black dude who plays Leon on the new season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Hahahahah.) ˆ posh tony ˆ misshapes ˆ

Here's another pic of the cute girl while Posh Tony can be seen in the background incessantly flapping his gums (as he's wont to do). ˆ posh tony ˆ misshapes ˆ

Here's me making the same stupid face... ˆ me ˆ misshapes ˆ

...twice in a row with different girls! It's 4am in this photo and the bar was closed. In the midst of taking stupid pics with Lauren... ˆ lauren flax ˆ me ˆ misshapes ˆ

...there was a vampire attack! HISS! ˆ leigh ˆ misshapes ˆ vampire ˆ

Look out! Look out! Hair-biting vampire attack! ˆ lauren flax ˆ leigh ˆ me ˆ misshapes ˆ pick ˆ vampire ˆ

A half an hour later, I went downstairs to get my coat and lookee who I found catchin' a lil' nap down in the basement. Hey, we all need a break sometimes. ; ) ˆ leigh ˆ best ˆ misshapes ˆ sleepy ˆ

On Monday I got the issue of New York Magazine that... ˆ magazine ˆ new york ˆ

...named Sarah and Leigh as two of New York's "Most Influential New Yorkers!" Here's the two-page spread of my two lovelies side by side! Congrats, you two! ˆ leigh ˆ sarah ˆ magazine ˆ

Later that night I went out with Amanda. We got lifted. ˆ amanda ˆ me ˆ

Ok! Here's a doozy of a night for you! On Thursday night I went to the Annex to celebrate Gurj's birthday! Here's the birthday girl with her heart-throb, Rob Stevenson! ˆ jeet ˆ rob stevenson ˆ birthday ˆ

On the way in to the party I ran into (Sketchy!) Jimmy Mullen, Grant and Viola (who used to throw the most ridiculous Halloween Parties ever...see Halloween 2002 and Halloween 2001). Jimmy and Viola were on their way out, which means that they missed my "performance" later on in the evening. ˆ grant ˆ jimmy mullen ˆ viola haqi ˆ

That's right, I wasn't just at Gurj's birthday as a friend, I was there as a hired performer! You see, Sarah had been unsuccessful in her attempts to hire a male stripper and so she ended up asking me if I'd be willing to do it (Sarah knew all about my previous experience as a male stripper). She offered to pay me, but in the end I told her I'd settle for being paid back the money she already owed me! Hahaha. So around 1am that night, they called Gurj up onto the stage, and in front of pretty much all of our friends... ˆ me ˆ sarah ˆ hoodie ˆ

...I climbed up onto the stage and whipped off my clothes. ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ stripper ˆ

Here's Gurj doubled over with hysterical laughter as I wiggled my wang. ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ stripper ˆ

While this photo might make it look like Gurj is holding her hands up to sheild herself from my ass... ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ stripper ˆ

...the next photo reveals that she was just actually winding up to spank me! Hahaha. Just as I'd managed to convince the crowd that the stripping part of the show was over... ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ stripper ˆ

...I kicked off my boxers to reveal ANOTHER LAYER! The panties that I borrowed from Niki the Roommate and turned into sweet, sweet manties. ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

I danced my way across the stage back over to the birthday girl... ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

...and showed her THAT ASS! Hahaha. ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ laugh ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

Then I REALLY showed that ass...to the, um, audience. Sorry about that, everyone. (FYI: This entire little dance number I'm doing was choreographed to Stacey Q's 2 of Hearts). ˆ me ˆ butt ˆ dance ˆ man ass ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

Oooooh, yeah. Happy Birthday, Gurjeet! ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

Oh Hai! I can grope titties? (I love how Gurj has her hands up in the air all like "Yes, he's touching my boobs, but this is a totally one-sided thing!") ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ dance ˆ grope ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

Here's the final photo snapped as I ended my birthday stripper performance! Happy Birthday, Gurj! I love you! ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ best ˆ manties ˆ stripper ˆ

I came down off the stage and was met by these three lovely ladies: Meredith, Niki the Roommate (thanks for the panties!) and Hot Karla. Look at these three vixens! They look like girls from an 80s rock video! Hey, can I get a little "smoke machine" action? ˆ hot karla ˆ meredith ˆ niki ˆ

Perfect, thanks! ˆ hot karla ˆ meredith ˆ niki ˆ

A few minutes later, Gurj came over with a bundle of cash (aka - the money that Sarah already owed me) and I gots paid! Woooo! Here's Gurj getting ready to make "the deposit." ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ manties ˆ

And here's me (finally back in clothes...whew!) flashing my cheddar in front of the birthday girl's bizzoobies. ˆ jeet ˆ me ˆ boobs ˆ money ˆ

Then we had a dance party! ˆ hot karla ˆ meredith ˆ dance ˆ

Meredith and Hot Karla showing off their moves. ˆ hot karla ˆ meredith ˆ dance ˆ

Me and Niki. Hahaha. ˆ me ˆ niki ˆ tongue ˆ

I said goodbye to Karen and left the Annex... ˆ karen ˆ me ˆ hoodie ˆ

...to stop over at Happy Ending (for what I think was) Timmy's birthday party. Here's Timmy and Jess. ˆ jess ˆ timmy ˆ balloons ˆ

All that dancing took a lot out of me! Here's me getting ready to replenish all those calories I burned shaking my ass on stage with a late night pot o' mac and cheese (How else do you think I maintain that svelte figure of mine?). Photo (and panties) courtesy of Niki the Roommate. Thanks, Niki! ˆ me ˆ cooking ˆ manties ˆ

The next morning I had to wake up bright and early to attend an all-day, off-site strategy meeting for work. Here's CTO, Mike Montero, kicking the morning off. ˆ mike montero ˆ cci ˆ

And here's a bunch of my co-workers trying to stay awake. Hahah. ˆ cci ˆ

The off-site was held at the conference rooms at Chelsea Piers so after our strategy sessions were finished, we got to play golf... ˆ ben sun ˆ mike montero ˆ cci ˆ golf ˆ

...indoors! ˆ golf ˆ videogames ˆ

They had that golf simulator where the course is projected onto a big, plastic screen in front of you. You take a real club and real balls and hit them at the screen full force! They have sensors that detect the trajectory and speed of the ball hitting the screen and it shows you where your ball "went." ˆ golf ˆ videogames ˆ

It's really fun, but also sorta scary to wind up and hit a golf ball at a screen that's like 4 feet in front of you. ˆ golf ˆ videogames ˆ

Later that night I went to the Bowery Ballroom to see Posh Tony's band, The Five O'Clock Heroes, play! ˆ posh tony ˆ five oclock heroes ˆ

On Saturday Meredith took me to a tiny park right around the corner from my apartment where they have... ˆ chickens ˆ

...FUZZY CHICKENS! Have you ever seen anything like this? ˆ chickens ˆ fuzzy ˆ

I just did a bit of Googling and found out that they're called "Silkie Chickens!" How strangely appropriate! ˆ chickens ˆ fuzzy ˆ

After we were done watching the fuzzy chickens, Meredith and I went over to Tompkins Square Park where we ran into this guy... ˆ grant ˆ ipod ˆ park ˆ sunglasses ˆ

...and this gal! ˆ niki ˆ hoodie ˆ

Meredith had a packet of little plastic toys that Niki bought for her in Japan... ˆ meredith ˆ sunglasses ˆ toy ˆ

...which she used to fill navels. ˆ stomach ˆ

...and create treasure trails. ˆ asleep ˆ stomach ˆ

It was so relaxing in the park that I ended up... ˆ grant ˆ niki ˆ book ˆ park ˆ sunglasses ˆ

...falling asleep! Apparently, the penalty for falling asleep is to suffer the indignity of having little toys put over your nipples... ˆ me ˆ asleep ˆ toy ˆ

...and peeking out of your fly! Oh, the horror! Then even took obscene pictures... ˆ belt ˆ fly ˆ jeans ˆ

...of my armpit. (Why, what did you think it was?) ˆ armpit ˆ gross ˆ

After the park, Grant and I stopped over Fatty's house to pick up a bag of blank CD sleeves that we were going to use to hand-make the artwork for the new Fiasco EP. While we were at his apartment, Grant moved an amp out of the way and made a shocking discovery! ˆ grant ˆ condom ˆ lube ˆ uncomfortable ˆ

Fatty's been having himself some sex! *gasp!* ˆ condom ˆ lube ˆ

Then we went back to my apartment and started using a stamp (that I designed and had custom-ordered!) to create album artwork for Faux Real, Fiasco's first five-song EP! (You can download it on iTunes here). We were inspired by all the self-released EPs that Sarah did for the first few bands on her label! First we'd use a roller to ink the stamp and then... ˆ ink ˆ stamp ˆ

...we stamped each CD envelope. Here's Grant holding up a newly stamped jacket! ˆ grant ˆ fiasco ˆ

After we'd stamped a couple hundred of them, we took them out into my apartment's stairwell, and gave them each a blast of pink spray paint. ˆ me ˆ paint ˆ

Here's Grant in action! ˆ grant ˆ cd ˆ paint ˆ

And here's what an album cover looked like when it was finished. ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ

Meredith came over to help out! ˆ meredith ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ paint ˆ

She ended up painting a ton of album covers...AND her wrist! ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ paint ˆ

Then we put the finished products on the stairs to dry! ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ stairs ˆ

Meredith sat down about halfway up the flight of stairs... ˆ meredith ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ stairs ˆ

...and was pretty much trapped up there 10 minutes later. Haha. ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ stairs ˆ

The process was really messy and labor intensive, but really cool because in the end each EP cover came out unique. Here's an example of on that came out really well! ˆ cd ˆ fiasco ˆ

Later that night, I went over to the Annex to meet up with Mandy (who I hadn't seen in AGES). ˆ mandy ˆ me ˆ

Then she took me to the GUN SHOW! ˆ mandy ˆ gun show ˆ

In the midst of Mandy's Gun Show, Jeffrey spotted us from across the room and literally, crashed our party! Haha. ˆ jeffrey ˆ mandy ˆ me ˆ get a load of this guy ˆ laugh ˆ

He tried to make up for it by staging his own gun show, but yo, that shit was weak! ˆ jeffrey ˆ gun show ˆ

Turns out that Jeffrey was there with a big group of people that included Eileen Chiang, my former co-worker back from the crazy Spring Street Networks days of yore! ˆ eileen ˆ

So Jeffrey and Eileen and their whole crew came over and joined us! ˆ jeffrey ˆ strangers ˆ

And then Gina "SmellsGood BonJersey" showed up with Michael and our quiet little night of grabbing a catch-up drink pretty much turned into a rowdy mini-party. ˆ gina bonjersey ˆ michael ˆ

Awwwww! ˆ mandy ˆ me ˆ

Hi, think we've all had a few drinks? Nice to see you everybody! ˆ eileen ˆ jeffrey ˆ mandy ˆ me ˆ drunk ˆ